How to steal your family inheritance

advisor4qb 2 years ago

Narcissists who do this should be put into jail.  Great hub, Mighty Mom.  I can only imagine what you must be going through with that sister-in-law of yours! Just remember that even if she reads it, she will somehow rationalize that she is justified in her actions. Sickening! A good keyword for this might also be "elder abuse!"

badcompany99 2 years ago

Woooo that was so so well written, with a little streak of sarcasm and venom perhaps, loved it !

Queen of the Lint 2 years ago

I'm so sorry you're going through this! It's worse to be betrayed by a family member, I think, just devastating. Hang in there.

Janetta 2 years ago

Wealth in only a few simple (though slightly illegal, maybe) steps! Congratulations, MM, you've just become my financial planner! LOL

emohealer 2 years ago

Hey, you may or may not be venting, but in the end I think you are opening the eyes of some who may have even considered this an option with their justifications in place.

Keep sharing the other side, venom and fangs are ok, sugar doesn't lessen the effects of poison and poison is what you are talking about here.

As always I enjoy your presentation style and pictorial attachments.

Raven King 2 years ago

Hi Mighty Mom. It is scary how some family members are predators and feel justified. Scary, scary stuff.

Tom Rubenoff 2 years ago

So sad. Who can even think that way? I boggles the mind. Thanks for writing this MM.

kiran8 2 years ago

I am so sorry Mighty Mom, Hope things work out - all the best :)

emievil 2 years ago

Mighty Mom, hang in there! Never ceases to amaze me that siblings who grew up together or children of loving, rich parents end up duping their innocent family just to get their inheritances and their siblings' inheritances.

I'll keep the above in mind just to make sure the same doesn't happen to any of my (rich) relatives or friends. Thanks for the eye-opener!

puppascott 2 years ago

I don't want to leave a comment if I will be incriminated in anything. So I won't.

Teresa McGurk 2 years ago

Good GAWD this is awful. Just awful. So sorry, so amazed, kinda speechless. Scum-sucking bottom-feeding venomous little skank is how I would characterize your sister-in-law.

steffiw 2 years ago

happened to me a year ago,i could see what was happening and spoke out,was told i was paranoid and evil for suggesting such a thing could be done by such a lovely lady and her daughters,result was my dad died without me being allowed to see him and rest of extended family "accidently"given wrong funeral date!we are named in trust(they are trustees)not allowed anything for 80years-i am 46,my children are 20 and 17....

steffiw 2 years ago

getting stronger by the day mighty mom,i truly hope there is justice for everyone some day,miss my dad even at 46,desperately but we are the better people and we are LOVED AND RESPECTED,something these people will never have-great hub,food for thought!

Janetta 2 years ago

HAHA glad I could make you chuckle!! :D

Iðunn 2 years ago

My brother and sister did this to me and my other sister. They took control of my father who was suffering from dementia after my mother passed away, had all the family money put into a medical trust for him with their own names attached and hauled his senile self to a lawyer at a point when he had no idea what he was signing and got me and my sister written out and in a way that they could keep inheritance taxes at a minimum. Yay for them, I guess. Dunno how they live with themselves.

I wish you better luck than I had.

mukut657 2 years ago

keep it up......

http://picforyou.webs.com/

Erick Smart 2 years ago

Wow this is terrible! I cannot imagine just snagging the cash like that. But then I hear of worse where the one in charge after the death just takes it all.

Iðunn 2 years ago

mightymom, it wasn't a lot of fun but it follows a family history of money as priority, lies and garbage so it was less surprising than it could have been... to me, anyway. my sister karen was pretty mad but that was because she used to be one of those finagling freaks who benefitted from and expected the remainder of my parent's money and boy was she surprised when it ceased being the three of them screwing me over and ended up with two of them screwing us both over. I still think my brother david will clean out the bank account and rip off the final sister over time, if he hasn't already but I quit communicating with them all finally. it's like that game show where people keep dropping through the floor randomly until only one is left.

I fled the game early in life and had few expectations and I'm sure I was the better for the flight. toxic people, all of them.

Iðunn 2 years ago

dunno if it helps but you have my warm thoughts. I do hope you come out ok in your situation, but if you don't, money really isn't everything. I mean, it must be something or two adults who both own two houses each wouldn't have stolen what would be a pittance of their own incomes from their disabled sister by commiting a felony, but whatever it takes for people to do that, I'm just grateful I don't have it in me. I'm still happy, I doubt any of the batch of my siblings ever will be, even with the money. I suppose that is something.

1kmjs 2 years ago

Just ridiculous....

pgrundy 2 years ago

This sent so many things running through my head I might have to write my own hub so I don't hog your comments section. I'm glad you can vent here and get some support, which it sounds like at this point you definitely need. ((((hugs))))) What you are experiencing sucks, there's just no nice way to say it. But what's really astonishing is how often this kind of thing happens.

I was executor on both my grandmothers and my mother's will and both times other family members stepped in to bully me and become dramatic and abusive. Only one of them was smart enough to actually hire his own attorney though--that was my uncle, a former CEO of a multinational corporation who nearly went to prison for rigging bids and other lovely types of fraud. He's comfortably retired now, a multimillionaire gentleman farmer. That was his punishment once he was acquitted--early retirement with millions. He gave his own mother a private funeral (it would have killed her but she was already dead) and told us we were to ignore her will and distribute her estate according to his wishes, which, after one of the ugliest scenes I've ever witnessed we did end up doing, just to be done with it.

Crime pays in the U.S. It pays really well. And when parents die or become ill it brings out the worst in so many people. Every rivalry, every neurosis, every resentment, comes to the foreground and if money is involved that just makes it worse. It's hard to make sure you get what you want once you're dead. My experience has been that people often don't, even after they've tried their best to insure it legally. Good hub.

rickyracer 2 years ago

wow good hub. eye opening.

darntoothysam 2 years ago

Hahaha love it... oh wait, no it's bad! =) It sucks there are people that have done this and will do things like this any time they are given the chance.

Can't we all just get along?

Karen Banes 2 years ago

I was thinking this was a humorous piece and that you had a pretty sick sense of humor, until I read the comments. Your family member will do doubt need the money in her own old age as I doubt someone like that will have any friends or family to support her! Sorry to hear you're in such a crappy situation and hope you can work something out.

pollyp2000 2 years ago

Funny article with just the right touch of sarcasm.

Jerome Morrow 2 years ago

I didn't think the sarcasm was appropriate for such a terrible deed. But let me share you my story - when my dad passed away he decided to leave our inheritance in the hand of our mother. It totaled millions of dollars. We could have lived 3 life times and still had enough. Mom kept on warning Dad that if he gave the inheritance or divided it - me and my siblings would marry horrible partners who would divorce us and run off with the family fortune. Fine, she was always super thrifty. But instead, it was mum who kept on getting conned by sweet talkers and threw our inheritance over to sweet talking stockbrokers/conmen or invested it in dubious schemes. I told her she was out of her depth as she had always been a housewife and had zero expertise in financial matters. The truth hurt her pride and she refused to accept my counsel. I mean, I was her baby ffs, what the hell would I know? So having lost most of everything, she spends the rest of our inheritance now at the casino. $10k a week. I struggle to forgive her. She's such a stubborn foolish woman who refuses to see a doctor for her depression.

Jerome Morrow 2 years ago

Hi, I guess I took it the wrong way because one of my Uncles did the same thing to my dad which caused him a great deal of bitterness. Now a similar thing has befallen my family, maybe its some kind of generational curse? At least, it caused me to think more seriously about God, Jesus and life. Ah, there is nothing we can do legally - as its legally her money and she's not doing anything criminal. You can't put someone in jail for doing wasting her own money. She's not insane per se. She just does very dumb things occasionally. Dad would be spinning in his grave if he knew what mum was doing. The terms of dad's will was specific - it all went to mum. He didn't suspect she would become this way. Dad was pretty smart - academically - but he was not a very good judge of character. Poor EQ. He was more worried than me and my siblings would do something stupid with the cash. What happens when it runs out? Well, I guess mum then has to depend on the charity of the children she cheated the father's inheritance out of. Very hard. We're trying to contain mum at the moment - shuffling her from one grand kid babysitting session to another - in the hope that she'd find more meaning in life looking after grandkids than in pressing a poker machine button. It works, sort of. We pray too - that seem to be the only thing we can do.

jump mam 2 years ago

nice tips

RK Sangha 2 years ago

Wonderful hub. Its really difficult to believe that this has been written by a poet. You are a competent writer. Congratulations.

The Rope 2 years ago

glad to hear the legal aspect is almost over, hope the healing doesn't take years and years. we're all here for you!

truthseeker 2 years ago

My father died 19 yrs. ago, and just found out that my eldest brother cleaned up all his accounts $180K to be exact! We signed for him to represent us thinking he was honest and will do right by everyone. Guess not! I am so furious and don't know what to do. He needs to pay somehow... but this was years ago, not sure if the courts will even consider a case against him!

Christopher Floyd 2 years ago

I see two problems with this method. First, dear old moms could have another doctor examine her and declare her of sound mind and body. A judge would hold a competency hearing, which could seriously monkey wrench the whole scam. Second, Unsuspecting Sibling could always file against the lawyer for failure to represent, adding a huge push for conduct unbecoming an officer of the court, and then ask a judge to have the lawyer investigated. Actually, this seems to me to be the way to go. Turn Unsuspecting Sibling into Cunningly Deceptive Sibling. The sibling sues the lawyer for gross negligence, misconduct, whatever... and takes not only the lawyer's cut but whatever else the court can award. Two siblings, two cons, one big happy family. Oh, and get moms in an assisted living facility where she's more interested in playing bridge and gossiping than venturing out in public.

But that's just me.

Argodamus 2 years ago

I just had something very similar happen to me... Mom died and the stepdad ran away with everything to the last penny... These people should be hunted

sickbastard 2 years ago

Gawd! I loved this! You know my oldest half-brother actually did something similar to our father (who's by the way, suffering from lung cancer)? But he not only stole the cash from him, he actually took all five businesses that our father had major shares in, leaving my mother to meet mine and dad's financial needs alone. Now we're fighting it out in court to get dad's will probated. Your article actually cheered me up a little as I got to see what was probably running through his mind for the past two decades. Hope you and your hubby win yours! :)

SteveoMc 2 years ago

It may be a disaster but the hub is hysterical. I too love to see the humor in the stuff that happens, okay, so it is satire....the best kind of funny in my mind! But then again my mind might be a little mushy. I hate whiners, but this presentation is perfect. Thanks for sharing a horrible situation in such a entertaining way.

The Phone Lady  23 months ago

This is obsurd!!! I swear my sister did exactly this . How are anyone post this to the internet...this is so wrong!!

You should be ashamed of yourself for putting this on here

Grow up get a life , a job and go to hell

Robyn 22 months ago

I have a question concerning this article. Specificly to the author. I am the youngest of four and my father is a very wealthy man. My older siblings have done everything to damage my relationship with my father, to the point where I can't even come around anymore. However my father still visits ocasionally to see his grandson. He visited two times this year to see us. My oldest sister is the executer of his will, then my other sister, and then me, and then one of my other oldest sisters. I am not sure how it all works when he passes away. But I am at the point that if he did I would be afraid to even show up to his funeral because of them. They have done that much damage. Anyway, my father says he wrote the will in a way that no one can dispute it. But even if it could be disputed I would not even no how to do that. But I have this feeling their going to make sure I don't see any inheritence. They are already talking about putting him in an old folks home, but never told him their thoughts. He drives just fine from one state to the next. I honestly think he would be pissed if even knew they have talked about it. My dad is divorced/single. So my mom has nothing to do with his health decissions. If I even told my dad what they have been saying, he would not believe me. They have made me into a liar in my dads eyes. I am completely torn. Should I just forget about inheritence and focus on my family or is there a way to protect myself from them. please I could use your advice. thanks

Robyn 22 months ago

Thanks Mighty Mom!

My dad had a really good lawyer. He actually told us at a sit down some years ago about what he did. He said he has watched his friends pass away and then see their kids fight over inheritence. He did not want that to happen to us, so he said the inheritence would be divided in four. For each of my sisters and me. Which pissed my older sister off. She actually told my mom that she said she would get more money because she had four kids. I couldn't believe it when I heard it. But when I got married there was a big fall out in my family. My sisters stopped talking to my mother and she wasn't allowed to see her grandchildren. They made her out to my dad as if she was some horrible person. My mom isn't very wealthy and its hard for her cause my dad just waves money and everyone goes running to him. My mom doesn't have that kind of leverage. Which is sad that their even like that in the first place. I think that is why my dad and I have a rocky relationship to began with. I don't come running when he waves money. And I think my siblings use it against me. Basiclly I don't kiss my dads butt. I just know there is so much more to life then materialistic things. But again it would be nice to have money to pay your bills and plan for your childs college education. I am not going to pretend I don't want the money but I am just not going to change who I am and manipulate my father. I have always been honest with him and to the point. I think that bugs my siblings. My mother thinks I should fight for my inheritence and not just let it go. She says to do it for my son, but I don't want to be like them and I don't want my son to ever grow up thinking money is the most important thing. It's a nescesity to live but I don't want him to scheme and cheat other people to get it. Anyway I just wasn't sure if I should get a lawyer now or not. I just never dealt with this kind of thing. I am sorry this happened to you by the way. It's rotten when people do these kinds of things. And their affair with money is always short lived especially if they never had that kind of money before. They end up blowing it. I knew of a girl who inherited 50 grand and blew it in a month on drugs and her boyfriend who happens to be my brother n laws brother. It was funny kind of because she kept bragging how she was going to be rich. 50 grand is not rich but i am sure its nice to have. Well after the money ran out the boyfriend left. Duh

Anyway people can be real ignorant when it comes to money. My dad always said when you have a lot of money you have people coming out of the woodwork claiming to be your friend. But he said their not real friends.

Anyway sorry for my long message. lol\

but you have been really helpful. I could never find anyone to talk to about this. The people i did would just look at me with a blank stare and say they can't relate. Which I wasn't asking them to relate but anyway thanks so much for your reply. I really loved your article and sarcasm. I love good sarcasm. It's just sad that that had to happen.

okmom23 19 months ago

MM, I agree with you, this is a very common situation.

pinaone 18 months ago

You guys are lucky i'm in the middle of a double header theft. my sisters trying a trifeca but i'm ruining her and her attorneys plan AHHH I feel so bad for them they are going to rot in hell. Only people I know could steal from My dad My Mom And dead brother pay her children but is doing the best she can to forget my children. how do you guys deal with the attorney? They are the ones enabling them any ideas sorry all, glad i found you guys

pinaone 18 months ago

Please everyone, go to Rate your Attorneys blogs? sites and sent them here.they can see what the results are from their hard work. Destruction,deceit, hate greed,family destruction how sick we got hope there proud. thanks mighty mom i will tell you this soon not over yet but please do this for our parents, ourselves and our siblings that were enabled to destroy us

pinaone 18 months ago

I have posted to avvo.com which any if you havent already, go please i am trying to get attorneys to hear are handtied stories. one arrogant Attorney calls this "Banal" what arrogance. If There are more free attorney sites please list someone out there must have a good heart and good advise.

pinaone 18 months ago

Hi all and mighty mom, this horror continues. what i meant by my sister going for a trifecta or in hockey 3 goals a 'hat trick' myFather passed in 03 while my brother and i cared for him and Mom 8 straight months in a row while big sister was going for second time to attorney trying to all his assets that belonged to mom some gifted to us 3 children, she succeeded with us knowing a thing. I just found my power of a atoorney she almost threw out last month, as soon as he was buried she had my mother go and write her will only thing was that she had one already written but the new attorney wrote a new to make her an executrix and trustee avoived the powers of attorney all 3 of us had to act together for Mom. since my mom does not drive or speak English my brother and took turns taken care of her and her finances. With help from big sis when she wanted to go see attorneys. 3 years later still not knowing where my fathers Trust and where his will was filed. My brother has sage 4or 5 cancer and was told he had about 8 months to live. I took him to Drs Apptointments drove him while taling care of mom and Him. We planned our masoleum crypts together he was divorved and noone in our family wanted to be near so i vounteered so we would be in the sunshine and wacthing our parents. while my sister timed his death with this now 3 time attorney to manuver his money around so it would mostly go to her family and not mine or mom's. she had him chane a large IRA from mom to herself only. I went with them to make out his will the first time with my sister of course. then a month later my brother asks wher did i go when i was supposed to at attorneys office with him and my sister. i said no where why i thought you were done he said no my sister took me again and said i was busy and couldn't come. i told him that was not true and ended it. (She had him chang alot the second tie when he was in and out from medicines) not thinking anything terrible with my sister and her friend attorney.my sister sets up a home hospice for him until the day he died and the last words i hear from him were SISTER CALL THE AMBULENCE I WANT TO GO TO THE HOSPITAL" I freaked and ran and told my sister he doesn't want to die Iam going to call. Since he belonged to the member there would have been no charge but regardless she sai absolutely not! he wants to die at home I was so sick. He died in August and on Sept 1 guess were we went. Yes attorney for 2 reasons to tell us she has control of his whole estate he left her his IRA and we are not to ask (mom and i any questions) and after that we had gone back again with a new will already prepared for mom with my father and brother's name still on it and she had the super power of attorey while i had the caring part. how she became an extrix and trustee over night was mind boggling to my mother and I. That's when I said something's wrong here.she had her family over day one taking home and shipping stuff out of my brothers house till there was not a thing left. i was so upset I was screaming at my brother in law. we didn't speak for months until things cooled off oh and i went back to the attorney the following month to change powers of attorneys to act together She and attorney were so upset and after four years i found out. my sister gave us beneficiary notices of ourinheritance much later and already wanted to be my moms executor. my mom has to be explained over and over but my sister lies to her so she finnally told her no. everything will be equal to the penny when i die. so i let her and her family take my inheritance but not my childrens. no info was given to me in 4 years until one i asked her for a statement of my children acct in my brothers estate for our accounts. well she cursed and screamed at me likei was asking her for something so odd. flag!! went up and since then i know all about how she and her high priced/ profile attorney were not only taking me and kids for a ride but stole my dads trust money mom's money that she put illegally his name on used fake powers of attorney and e- bank tranferrals to her name and family without my mothers consent. had all my brothers expenses paid plus a large ira which she has never claimed to irs her kids took out most of their money no questions no age asked. her attorney wrote 3 more lw and t for my mom which weren't necessary they were all rigged for her benefit. the attorney threw me and and after writing moms final will threw her out too.i brought her to court after informing myself about all this not to sue but to get information an when my children will be getting there money it's late like almost 3 years. a compel of accounting where none at all was done.What was evenually submitted was asolutley fradulant i'm still laughing over it. i wrote my own real one with my mom.so mom is getting agry over this court situation because it's costing her to much in lawters fees handle it yourselves. i sai ma Last time i do anything for her. so i said ok i wrote, emailed her and her attorney who has recused herself from court. no reponse i finally sent her a certified letter, return receipt with her husbands name on it and heard nothing in a month that i completely forgot about. now my son and daughter get a letter to compromise from this attorney but the stipulation was i can not use computer talk to my sister, mother any third party basically all my constitution rights have it notarized and send back so my kids will get there money????? Hello, not that stupid here. # 1 how dare she get involved again the deal was no lawyers or courts #2 where was my no money request while her attorney charged my sisters 1 day at court 14 thousand to my kids accts they never got?? i crossed out anything that i didn't like and they said just send it gets the kids money and end it. As of today they have still not reported an accounting to court no information as to when where how and amount of money they will be getting.im giving them a few more days.. I looked at my brother will one last time and i see in the very back of it a word called Collateral Decendents do not have to receive if voted on by the majority which of course my sister has and my children were adopted at birth. so they know no other uncle but my Brother. he left them 1/6 of his estate sale of his house they are named and all. i have poa's for them and wndering what they will be up to next.......Anyone want a sister and a the lowest form of a human called an estate Attorney for enabling her to pull this off? MIGHTY MOM GLAD U ASKED? LOL I can't wait till civil time comes i'm already packed up..Bye all

pinaone 18 months ago

I forgot to say the most important thing as my parents always told us" I don't care how rich or poor any of you are, when i die if i have three pennies left then each of you will get one, and do what you want with it.. i said that's great the lesson that was hidden in there that my smart ass sister never learned was that I would give my penny(inheritance i did anyway) to her in a second, if i knew she was stuck finally, Don't steal from me and children, ask for it, hint around i'll understand. Stealing i don't! cause I am dirt poor now and she knows it but, i wouldn't steal from her or anyone.

pinaone 18 months ago

ok, it gets better, now my 2 children are adopted from birth,they are young adults now. I am wondering why my sister and attorney have not yet paid my children. but there's were/ leaving me to beleive that 1- they are up to no good nd trying to run out the money before this no tax year is over or 2- my children were written down on on moms will ( still alive) as Collateral Decendants? But an un born fetus is on the will. no blood relatives can inherit. i looked up most recent law and all I found out was this was a very vague subject, but only the blood relative me can get their inheritence. now what if i'm dead tomorrow? Their are so many diffferent family setups ( stepchildren, half sisters, children from 2 different spouses,same sex adoptions ) Could you beleive the law would classify children as such.my children know they are adopted and they know their uncle for as long as they lived, their Godfather, and custodian of their trust. he listed them unconditionally,I just don't get it they will never end. The less information they give me the more afraid I get my newphews wish death on me are you kidding me? Anyone have adopted children let me know Bye MM and all

Joe 17 months ago

Dang, you and my wife could be related after reading this scenario which is nearly word for word what is happening to her, except for the fact that the parents are reversed, mother passed on first. Oldest sib did exactly what your article says and had her buddy, buddy attorney help her all the way. Had their father committed and suddenly he doesn't have the money he said he did? All possessions taken by the oldest sib and one other that went along with the plan, while the rest of the kids (including my wife have nothing of their fathers personal belongings) let alone any kind of inheritance (it's been over two years and it was a trust). My wife did hire an attorney but it just costs too much money to fight it out and the crooked attorney just loves a good fight in court to drag it out so you run out of money to fight. Sadly I know my wife will get nothing while the two other sib's take everything. Sometimes you just can't win no matter what anyone says.

bobbieoma54 17 months ago

i THOUGHT THIS WAS A GREAT ARTICLE, THIS IS ALSO HAPPENING IN MY FAMILY. The lawyers are the ones that win.

mysticone 14 months ago

my family was so abusive and hurtful when i was a teenager, i mught just do this and be glad i am finally getting them back after all these years

MrTrustStore 13 months ago

Wow, that was seriously hilarious! Thanks for the great laugh!

MrTrustStore 13 months ago

Hi MM,

Yeah, I saw those comments. I think that's how you know you've done your job REALLY well. Satire at it's best! I find the hub really interesting from numerous standpoints. Perhaps the most important of which is that you had a real life experience and are able to educate people about the seriousness of it without them falling asleep. Which I know first hand is a challenge when speaking about death and taxes (or in your case elder abuse and fraud). Glad to hear things turned out well in your circumstances. I am hyper-cognizant of how important choosing the right agents, trustees, and executors are in estate planning. I always focus on this with my clients to make sure they are truly electing someone who is trustworthy. I believe in many situations, there is a history of dishonest behavior by such individuals who are not trustworthy. Parents may not want to admit this to themselves about their children of course. But this is another example of why finding the right attorney can make a huge difference in the end. They know how to ask the right questions and know how to draft an estate plan that takes each person's personal situation into account. Delicately working around the rouge sister-in-laws of the world is part of the art of estate planning. Anyhow, don't worry about those who don't get it. Those of us who do find your hub priceless!

Best,

MrTrustStore

Sjguri 12 months ago

I am on a similar situation right now. My sister and I had 3 irrevocable trusts in our name. She insisted in taking financial care of my father since he lived with her. We both had power of attorney. My father has dementia and is not able to take care of his finances. I was taking care of my 89 year old Aunt, also with dementia. After a period of a year my father said to me he thought she was taking his money. I investigated and found out one of the CD's. Had been moved into his checking account and she was writing checks using her POA and paying her personal bills and buying herself things. Like 7 fur coats and a new car. I am on the process of trying to get back the money. I will never speak to her again. She is a thief and goes to church every Sunday. Apparently she is not listening when she is there

angel Graham 11 months ago

Definitely elder abuse. Is there any way to find a lawyer who will talk to you without charging a fee to find out what other charges. Sounds like a lot of fraud going on with the "sister" (Won't dignify making it an actual, she's not acting like one at all.)

So sorry you are going through all this. It just isn't right. *sigh*

ForReals 10 months ago

My sweet angel of a cousin, who showed all family members how evil of a person I was, (LoL), did this to his mother, (my aunt). She is dying in a nursing home, while he lives in her house. Beware people who speak poorly of other family members, in his case it was all a master plan, a card trick as it were, look at my left hand, because in my right is the knife that will stab u in the back. It was a sick, sick thing he did, sadly I am still ousted from the family, mostly because no one is willing to say they made a mistake by believing all that he said. He played them and won.....

.josh. 10 months ago

This is an absolutely shocking read - wow. You could really make quite the story out of this...

Happy to hear all's 'contained' though.

sweena 9 months ago

HELP.... after readin this i really think someone cud help me..m 22 and of indian orign..my father expired 2 yrs ago. n somebody got some paper signed by him when he was on his death bed..now my father used to run a business. the place where he used to run the business is in my grandfathers name(father's father).my dad paid for the place but didn get the name transferred to his. so now my grand parents along with my uncle are not givin the land and i was away pursuing my education so cudnt take immediate action. now i am in a fix..as i dont have any legal knowledege..n the place i belong to is a small town so i cant hire a lawyer ...if i do my uncle willget to know...my uncle recently bought a car out of the business profits and my family is getting no financial help form the business....my business also is divided into three distibutorships owned by my mom, grandmother n my manager...i dont know who has the power of attorney. m so fucked with ths...i cant resume my job because i hv to be here to sought out stuff....anyone please help me....

MyFather'sDaughter 9 months ago

Thanks MM for this great read..and all the comments. Did you finally resolve in court your hyjacker?

I to am going through this..my Father passed almost 3 years ago and left his new wife of 6 years, as trustee/and personal rep for his trust and pour over will..she recieved a life estate on the ranch. We have not recieved one thing of Our Father's. She was not an heir in the trust. She has gone through all the trust money to remolded her life estate, and sold property to her children at under market value..all with the help of an estate lawyer paid for by the estate..now all the money is gone..We are now on our 4 lawyer..and hope to go to court soon, but trustee and lawyer cancel the dates over and over..it's a mess! She even threw out my Dad's ashes..no kidding..thanks for the vent..it is much more detailed than I can go into..it would take pages and pages..good luck to all here..I'm praying for all of you. Thanks again MM..

MyFather'sDaughter 9 months ago

Thank you.

Another Betrayal 8 months ago

Unfortunately, this happens all the time.

Things done is secret & adult children that feel they "deserve" it all ----Perhaps this is a topic that should be given more publicity.

sonburned 8 months ago

My spouse has also encountered a similar situation with a "greed Obssesed" sibling. It is pathetic what one family member is willing to do to another. All in the name of a few greenbacks. Your not alone! Best wishes.

Snowed 8 months ago

This goes on much more than you think! Mine was stolen by my only brother and my uncle. I trusted them, my mistake. We were always a close family, or so I thought, that loved and respected each other. To find out too late what had taken place after my Grandmother passed has caused emotional scars that seem like at this point will never heal. I have lost so much love and respect for them. There are just some things you should never do for money and screwing your family over is one of em'. I'll never feel the same towards them again. Was it all worth it? I think not. Get your priorities straight people!

claire 8 months ago

how distgusting that anybody can do this to their own family. i feel for all of those who have been affected and hope you find justice.

Linda 7 months ago

I have a sister-in-law who is a nurse. While on the job at the hospital, she met an elderly couple where one spouse was a patient. They had no children. Once home my sister-in-law and her husband (this is a guy that does no charitable acts for anyone in the family) started caring for this couple and their farm. Next thing you know the couple had passed on and all their assets somehow managed ended up in the name of my sister-in-law and her husband. The dollar value was well over $700,000.00. My sister-in-law at the time of all this activity had at least 4 kids and one was a newborn. Later I heard she was taking her kids to nursing homes and visiting the elderly. She was heard saying "there are so many elderly with farms and no children to help.

I've already warned my husband if I hear of her doing this again I am calling the State's Attorney General. What a low life scammer.

Sarina 7 months ago

Dear MM, My siblings look like they're planning to do what happened to you.

holly 7 months ago

omg we are going through the same thing. my sister in law moved my mother in law in, while she was on hospice and cleaned her out. my husband went to the bank with her yesterday to close the accounts and transfer things into the estate and the $34,000 that was there in 2010 is now $12. My husband almost threw up. Not to mention she convinced my mother in law to take out a reverse mortgage and give it to her as her "inherritance in advance" but she is now declaring she got none of that and everything is 50/50 just like the will states. she robbed her house 12 hours after she passed, stole all of her jewelry, cash in the house, checks she had as proof money was not a gift. It is such an absolute disgrace. We are going to Challenge the Will, claiming that mom always wanted things 50/50 and she intended for the cash advance to be apart of that. This is sick. I can NEVER imagine doing this to my siblings.

justice 7 months ago

wow! what wickedness. would it not be better to kill your parents and eat their flesh? think of that meat going to waste. there is only one type of person who would come up with such a plan. you must belong to one of the 12 lost sheep of Israel.

Baby of the family 7 months ago

As the baby my two older sibling actually had a new will signed by my brain damaged mother after my father died. I never knew how they resented the relationship me and my children had of love and care and devotion to my parents until now. Everyday when I wake up I feel anger and pain and it is so stressful and as i fall asleep I hate them so much. It is unreal that it happened and that it has happened to me and my children. Beware if you are the youngest who takes cate of your parents. Your older siblings are waiting to swoop in for the money and fuck you over right as things go downhill and at the demise of your parents.

P FARMER 7 months ago

OK MIGHTY MOM, SUPOSE A MEMBER OF THE FAMILY FINDS OUT THE HEAD OF THE CLASS IS NOT MENTLY ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF THE ESTATE , AND THIS OTHER PERSON FILES A COMPLAINT AND TAKES IT TO COURT. THE COURTS FIND IN FAVOR OF THE SECOND PART OF THE FIRST PART. WHAT THEN.OH YES THEAR HAS WRONG DOING OF THE FIRST PART/

slywillits 6 months ago

I'm disgusted to hear how many of you have had problems like this. My own mother took $100,000 my grandparents left for me in a trust. As badly as I feel about this, even though I am disabled and not particularly "young" I also am not elderly and living on "extreme" budget constraints. I am a FIRM believer in what comes around goes around...Karma is a ....]

slywillits 6 months ago

Mighty Mom:

I'm so glad things are starting to work out for you! I hope that you get immediate resolution to your absolute satisfaction. I'm finding in some cases you can gain up to double your "actual" damages.

In my case I'm just getting started so no my mom hasn't yet, nor will she probably ever live long enough to make amends. I've only recently made the decision to take my childrens grandmother to probate court to try to recover my money. In the meantime my firstborn grandaughter is due in December. Her first Great Grandchild! The shower is Saturday...Oh what a tangled web...

mrsmad 6 months ago

I feel that my brother is trying to dupe me too.

Mum has dementia and has had to move into a home.

We agreed to wait to clear his house until I got back from holiday.

I got back and the house had been cleared of all the good stuff....mum had been taken to the solicitor to make a power of attorney and it was made so that either my brother or myself can sign alone.

My brother wants to auction my mums house but I dont agree.

Im so angry and feel so betraid by how my brother has acted.

The power of attorney still isnt final but I dread what will happen when it is.

I fear he is going to fleece mum for as much money as he can.

Im stressed and worry constantly about mum and her finances.

To make matters worse I dont live near by so dont have any contact on a regular basis.

cant believe how some people lie and treat others.

slywillits 6 months ago

I don't mind sly at all. As for starting my own hub I kind of like talking to you, as I feel connected to you in a way only two people that have been ripped off only in this "special" family way can.

I truly hope all your patience in this situation pays off! I really know how frustrating it can be. I've waited since March to even decide to take legal action, trying to spare my children the embarrassment, etc.

I have no idea how I will retrieve the money. But lucky for me my mother bought several assets with the money that hopefully can be sold.

I threw the double damages part out for you in case that might apply to your situation! After all you've been through I thought that might help and I feel like you deserve it!

By the way I live in Missouri bought my grandparent lived in Kansas.

Thanks for your concern in my situation.

Best Regards,

sly

Janet 6 months ago

Sometimes there is more to the story than told. My grandparents divorced, and Gramps was legally told to sell house while grammy paid for apt. For 10 years he stayed in house. As soon as casket was closed on Gramps, mom swoops in. Grammy moved into house. Lawyer friend was called. So I took Grammy to a lawyer, and did the talking (she didn't want business told). Mom gets house (under)sold, and Grammy pays for apt again, after Gramps got 10 yrs free. I am on the black list. My dad dies, and due to mental instablities my brother moves into mom's house with his drunk wife. Mom goes into hospital twice, and at least once into a rest home because she would not stay in wheelchair. Mom signed house over to Bro. for him to "make repairs." Before she was out of the rest home, house was sold, and it is not known where the money is. Her things are missing other than a bed and table without chairs. Clothes, shoes, junky jewely is gone. She moves into a senior apt complex, living off of $500 month, plus meals on wheels. Some time between Grammy's situation and aft. Dad's death, Mom gives away Dad's family land to only 2 of 3 adult children. Land had been in family for 150 years. Oldest child is spitefully left out of land dividing. Child 2 stole mom's house and things. Child 3 is in prison for 20 on child (I can't even say it). So, its a mess. What comes around goes around. Remember the greed of taking grandparents house? And now Mom's is gone out of greed or something. There is always more to a story that isn't told...

kmacnbama 6 months ago

We are going through something eerily similar to this. This article seems to have been followed to the letter. My stepfather was cornered by his two biological kids to transfer roughly a million dollars worth of property into their names in his final weeks of life (while in hospital and on hospice)....My parents were married for nearly 20 years and my Pops left my mom 1/3 of everything so that is was evenly distributed. They saw the will and took matters into their own hands. We have tried to settle and they even agreed to settle, then they turned their nose to us, so now we will have to sue. The worst part about this is, this was "family" and when you think you can trust people, this is what happens. I don't know how they can justify taking from a widow woman who took care of their father until his last day of life. I wish there were laws in place to put people like this behind bars. This is stealing, and they knew it. If they can sleep at night after doing this, then it shows what kind of people they really are.

kmacnbama 6 months ago

You know, that is what keeps us going in this...We are doing what he intended. A couple of months back my stepfather and I had a conversation about the will (my stepbrothers were approaching mom weekly about it), and I asked him to have the boys stop approaching her. He told me, that he has it just like he wanted with everything in thirds and that he would ask them to leave her alone. It makes no sense a few months later just before he died that he would "sign" everything over for 30 dollars ($10 dollars for 2 parcels of land and a condo for $10)...Thanks again for your response...I will keep you posted on how this goes...

jeannieology 5 months ago

After my husband, an only child, was deprived of his inheritance after his only blood relative cleaned out my now late elderly mother-in-aw's bank account -- I decided to start a website.

I hope you like it.

http://inheritanceheisters.wordpress.com/

kmacnbama 5 months ago

I like your blog jeannieology!

I emailed my congressman to see about imposing a law against this sort of thing in AL...FL has a law in place where if things are stolen (that's right I said stolen) and the person dies, all transferred property from within the year prior to death must be brought back into the estate. It's sad we are even having this conversation but it is what it is...we just have to fight this sort of thing! Keep up the blog, I can't wait to get registered!

jeannieology 5 months ago

I'm going to keep it up. I plan on writing my way to justice. I am a published writer -- the legal system failed us (Don't ask). We're $60K in the hole and the perpetrators made off with $400K after changing my MIL's will/POA transferring funds and systematically emptying a bank account. My father in law left the perpetrator $20K in a will - she ended up with everything -- my precious husband $0.

jeannieology 5 months ago

Going to the media? I'll go with you -- we can go together.

jeannieology 5 months ago

Here is my story. My husband is the only child of a difficult mother who for 30 years has mistreated me, his wife, and controlled the whole family. My husband was the only one who wouldn't be controlled and at every turn defended me against the family shrew. Let's just say when we married no one in his family came to the wedding under threat of death. Truth is, I didn't meet the woman until 2 years after we were married.

My husband's closest relative, his cousin, her husband and mother stood by us emotionally over all these years...told us that she was unreasonable, but did so while maintaining a relationship with MIL.

Every few years my MIL would pull some shenanigans and there would be a falling out between hubby and MIL. The last falling out, over a glass of rose wine, cuz' and company swooped in, got MIL to change her will, POA etc, sold and moved her out of her home, into theirs and in 2 months cleaned out her bank account and spent the next two years with ATM cards and withdrawal slips emptied her bank account leaving her with $.04.

At 87 she was unhappy living in a one room apartment, with no heat or stove sleeping on a loveseat, my husband would visit her weekly. Let me backtrack she was increasingly getting more and more demented. I saw signs in 2007 -- they moved her out in 2008.

This past year she started asking "Where's my money," my unsuspecting husband never suspected cuz' who was chatting with us on the phone the whole time she was selling, moving, changing and withdrawing. Anyway we took MIL to live with us this past April...she was sick from day one, in and out of the hospital. When we couldn't get her 24 hour care we decided to apply for guardianship...that is when we found out my hubby was disowned and my MIL didn't remember how it happened.

Cuz and her mate counter petitioned for guardianship because they knew if my husband got guardianship over his mother he could petition the court for her lost assets.

We spent 4 months in court. My husband and I both questioned on the stand battered for doing nothing wrong...accused of so many things it was stunning. The judge, court evaluator and even the security guard knew what was up and that the shysters scammed us all -- we were due to go back to court this monday and cuz's slimy lawyer who knew MIL was in hospice took a 2 week vacay.

MIL died this Monday morning...surrogate lawyer is saying after wasting $60K in a guardianship case and being left with funeral bills and medical bills that it could cost another $50K to try to get what is rightfully my husbands (I don't know if I mentioned my husband's late father left $20K to the robber and everything to his son in 1998) that will was overtaken by the shamster's 2008 version.

The lawyer also said, we could win and never collect, so he can't take it on contingency. We're out of $ and the crook, who's a doctor by the way, and her fat ass, lazy, disability expert, retired husband get away with screwing us.

There is nothing we can do. So I'm going public. I'm not sure yet but I intend to figure out a way, since the courts and the law are willing to overlook Elder Financial Abuse and inheritance heisting, to nail their sorry asses to the wall.

Blessings - Jeannieology

jeannieology 5 months ago

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that one of the power of attorney responsibilities is fiduciary oversight which I'm sure you know includes protecting my MIL from with her POA did to her...now I'm sorry, I think that is against the law -- where is the law? Where is the DA, on vacation with cuz's lawyer?

jeannieology 5 months ago

I'm hoping the DA refers this to the DA...he may still do that. Cuz' is her niece so she was made POA, health care proxy and executor...

When my MIL was in intensive care the first time ... cuz' didn't even tell my hubby she was health care proxy.

When the court evaluator called her for an interview, which she refused to agree to, her only question was: "Do I have to give back the $" she never once asked how her aunt was.

I'm gonna write a book.

jeannieology 5 months ago

Sorry the judge refer to the DA.

BTW I pitched an article to More magazine -- so the drama is just beginning.

Jeannieology 5 months ago

I really hope cuz and her husband find this website and make their way over to mine. I want them to know that in the made for TV version of Thieves with PhDs, if I have anything to say about who plays cuz's part, I'm going to suggest they cast Chaz Bono.

jeannieology 5 months ago

I already spoke to my lawyer truthfully telling a story, and even mentioning names -- is not slander.

jeannieology 5 months ago

Here's today's post:

http://inheritanceheisters.wordpress.com/2011/12/0

jeannieology 5 months ago

Feel free to hog -- no one yet besides you...I'm getting some readership but not much yet. Heck I started the blog Monday -- we have to give it time.

Glad to have you and glad to have met you -- Blessings to you Mighty Mom.

jeannieology 5 months ago

My husband is starting to sound like me he's talking things like: "day in court...on the stand...brazen effrontery" - and I'm liking it.

Dufour 5 months ago

What advice does anyone have to someone who is afraid a

hostile, narcicisstic sister and her husband will do to me what was done to you? What do you wish you had done to protect yourself? They have already tried to push me out of the family, not included me in family outings, taken things out of the family like family photos, etc, talked about me behind my back, alienated their children from me. My sister was always my mother's favorite, now my father has just died, and although my mother insists the will is to be divided equally between the three children, I see the handwriting on the wall. Because my sister has a high executive position in her bank, and my mother just dotes on her, I see trouble ahead. My mother wanted my father's things thrown into dumpsters within weeks after his death, and they cleaned everything out, including throwing things away of mine I had stored there, and I went over there and got upset, and now they are trying to make it look like I'm the bad guy. I said some things I shouldn't have said, it wasn't my finest moment, but these are High Conflict Personalities who have been treating me like crap for years and years, and now they have this "proof" that I am this terrible person. It's just a nightmare dealing with these people. What can I do to protect myself BEFORE it happens? I can see my mother appointing Power Of Attorney to her- I'm sure it's going to happen. There are 3 children, and my sister can so easily manipulate my brother. I appealed to him, and he came back and said that I should really apologize to my sister because she's "having trouble getting over" being yelled at. They bait you for years and years and then when you finally blow, they are so happy because then they can look like the injured party. What do you do when you see trouble ahead- how can you protect yourself?????

kmacnbama 5 months ago

Dufour, one thing I wish I would have done, and it is sad to would have even needed to do this, but I wish I would have checked regularly online to see if any property has changed hands before my Father passed. If we would have caught the first transaction we could have had it overturned immediatly...Everything happens for a reason.

Dufour 5 months ago

Thanks for the feedback. If you can believe this, the following day I wrote in here, the attorney sent me and the rest of the family the will. There is a trust, and my mother is the Personal Representative and if for any reason she couldn't fulfill those duties my BROTHER, NOT my EVIL sister would be the personal representative, but then if something happened to him, then she would. I was initally hurt that I'm not even mentioned as ever being a personal representative since I'm the oldest, but

then I decided it was ok since both my brother and sister are CPA's and I'm the black sheep liberal arts type AND more importantly, I really think my Dad was looking out for me when he didn't appoint my sister first. She might have been the logical choice because she's a senior vice-president of a major bank and my brother, although he has a CPA, is a real estate agent. I know I need to look into it further, but I think it looks better for me than I thought. And if my Dad did do this smart thing for me, it makes me feel his love from the grave, and it makes me think he did see my sister can be a real -----. after all. I think my Dad might have been looking out for me. What say you?

AB 4 months ago

Hi Mighty Mom,

Thanks for posting your hilarious story, even though it looks like it was some time ago now. It really helped me as I am going through an awful situation that makes me feel completely powerless. I have just uncovered that for the past 4 years my father has been buying properties (6 of them) and putting them in my older sister's name for her to 'manage' the tenancies. I was hurt that I wasn't included and asked for my name to be put on the properties (my sister is untrustworthy and dishonest, and I know how I would fare long term if my father doesn't sort this out before the whistle is blown on him). My sister made up some cock and bull story about how it would cost too much to have my name anywhere near anything, and now I am regarded as the 'paranoid and jealous' sister if I say anything about it. My father is a good man but he is blinded by his unfazed respect for my 'business-minded' sister and maintains that because we are family, she will always look after me!! That is what gets me - the control thing. I don't want her looking after me or being the decision holder of my life with regards to what financial help I get. A lot of my friends have told me to leave it and accept that she'll get everything in the end, but everyday I feel more and more bitter about this situation that, despite five years of trying to change, has moved nowhere. In fact, he has just invested even more in her name. She has always been a control freak and money-oriented, so things couldn't have worked out better for her. I feel like I've always been honest, caring and done my best for other people. Look where it's got me!!

AB 4 months ago

Hey MM,

'Stupid siblings club' - that is classic, love it!

Thanks for your swift reply, I really appreciate it. First of all, let me say that I am in sunny old England, so the same rules don't apply as in the US. It does cost a nominal amount to put my name on the deeds, but my sister is clever and sly enough to weave this in to a story that makes it look like a bad idea. Believe me, I have challenged this informally in conversation and more formally with a written request, but to no avail. The stinker of all this is that she receives a large sum of his pension each month too to spend as she wishes, most recently on some plastic surgery. My dad is blinkered to this also and when I bring it up, again I just look like the jealous, paranoid sister. So he won't spend the money on transferring names, but she can spunk away money on getting her t**s done until she's blue in the face!!

As regards ownership, my father has absolutely NO ownership over anything anymore. He has everything in my sister's name (tax reasons for this as well) and is happy that my sister will take care of both him and myself. Happy families!!

I have asked to see documentation, bank statements etc, but he just directs all this over to my sister who ignores the requests. He has basically become a shell of a man when he used to be a strong-minded, reasonable individual. I have tried and tried to get him to see what is happening here and it's just making me ill.

What I find hard also is the fact that he has helped me financially over the years - he helped me buy the flat I currently live in and is helping with my student fees as I am putting myself through Uni again. All of this makes me feel so ungrateful but I can't help but feel bitter about the empire he has created for my sister, and the utter naivety he shows toward the situation.

I have thought about involving a solicitor but what can I do? As long as my father is happy with this situation I can't budge him. I have explained that it is only a small cost for me to be added to the names on the house deeds, but he just brushes me off. I'm so upset and disappointed that I have such little standing in my father's eyes that he's willing to dismiss my feelings so easily. I have become very emotional over this in the past, and he doesn't deal at all well with emotion, so I guess I kind of shot myself in the foot there.

My thoughts keep drifting to cutting myself off from him (I don't really have a relationship with my sister anymore anyway after this). I resent him and feel bitter towards him for putting me in this situation and refusing to help make things fair. But he's my father and it would hurt a lot not to be in contact with him.

I just don't know what I can do anymore.

AB 4 months ago

Hi MM,

Thanks again for your swift reply and thoughtful feedback.

Yes, I completely agree about trying to be involved in the business in some way, but she has thwarted any effort of mine to get involved. She has managed to convince my father that we couldn't work together so my idea of 'helping out' in the holidays when I'm not at Uni was refused. She just doesn't want me anywhere near anything, sniffing around in her business, because from what I understand she has spent a lot of Dad's money on cosmetic procedures and other luxuries that I think would make him rethink what he's actually doing if he knew. Hence, I have asked for the 'business account' bank statements but she ignores my emails.

I will ask to see the over-arching document, although from what I have been told it pretty much details my sister as having control over everything. My father honestly believes that she will be fair-minded and rational when it comes to helping me out! More recently, there has been a suggestion that a trust deed is drawn up so that if my sister wakes up one day and so wishes to sell one of the SIX properties (probably more by now) she fully owns, I will get 50%. This doesn't seem like such a bad deal, but again the control thing just gets me. I have to sit and wait until she decides she might want to sell, and she may never decide to sell, after all she's cashing in each month from the rent payments she gets on the properties, which will be a heck of an income for her.

I'm not sure I believe she's TRULY evil, she just has had this nasty, one-upmanship side to her since we were very young. She's very insecure and obsessed with ageing which affects the way she feels about everyone around her, and has a very spiteful side which she's happy to exercise. There's a real lack of human warmth or empathy within her, and I believe she'd be happy to see me struggle as she's always seemed particularly resentful and spiteful towards me. We had a very difficult upbringing and I think somehow she classes me as part of those bad memories and has never shown any loyalty or depth of feeling towards me.

I think you're right about the fairness thing - I think my father sees things as 'all working out' in the end. Very naive! I'm meeting him today to carry on my campaign and I'm really going to have to make sure I stay calm and rational as you said - it is actually the ONLY way he can deal with things.

I know it bothers him (some) that this situation makes me so unhappy, but he says he just 'doesn't know what to do for the best,' and can't I just rub along with things for a while until maybe a better solution presents itself or I calm down and accept my fate (which is what he thinks will happen long term).

The problem is that as more time goes on, everything becomes more entrenched in my sister's name and the chances of thrashing out any kind of fair deal become more unlikely. It's so hard to know when to give up and when to carry on as all the suggestions you have made to me are spot on, but they're all things I've tried to set up either via meetings with my sister and father, or in emails. Things have previously been agreed in meetings with them, only for her to go back to him after the meeting and explain that it's 'not a good idea,' putting me back to square one.

As I said, what makes it hard here is that I'm relying on him a little financially. If I were working, I would have more funds available to me and would have paid for top advice from someone in the family law system. Part of me wonders whether I should wait til I graduate in 2014 and then I will have an income, be independent of him and therefore more able to pay for good advice and move forward with this. But will it all be too late by 2014?

AB 4 months ago

Thank you so much for your advice, MM, it is spot on!

You have given me a lot of things to think about here and some very wise routes to trying to resolve this big mess of a problem.

I will keep you updated on this. In the meanwhile, I really wish you all the luck in the world with your nasty situation and am also a true believer in karma. You can run but you can't hide.

Stay happy, and most of all stay sane if you can!!

Thanks so much again,

AB

beinduninbyevl 4 months ago

it looks like i am in the midst of something like this happening to me as beneficiary except worse with worse people. dont know who to turn to .

grieftalk 4 months ago

Thank you for sharing; this situation is all to common. I know it is one of the life scenerio experience's that we all think; "not in my family; until it is played out."

I also agree with Mighty Mom and the referral to elder abuse. However in my situation the perpetrator and the attorney are pathological making proof difficult to find..."oh, the web they weave".

Geri 4 months ago

Pat is that you? sounds just like what happened in my family, my sister and her husband claim the memory patient "borrowed" them the money - which she probably only borrowed 10 bucks but they took $300,000 to help them self out of debt which ended up being trying to win more at the casino - guess what its ALL Gone and they are again in foreclosure and mom is in a place less than where she could have been after all the hard work, unselfishness acts, etc our parents provided us. How someone can live a conscious free life after doing that to their own mom is beyond any feeling.

Brother 4 months ago

Mom had dimentia, sis took mom in and proceeded to empty bank account, took all the money, and neglected giving meds. After discovery we reported to department of Elder Abuse and filed report with local police, but neither did anything. Claimed mom was adult and had to be the one to prosecute even though she had dimentia and didn't know she was on meds or what a dollar was. They left mom live with the sis, so we had to physically take her out of sis house and move her to a safe place. Good luck everyone. If it's abuse by a family member nobody will help you even if parent can't help themselves.

A VOICE OF A TRUTH 4 months ago

I am humble and thankful, To GOD BE ALL GLORY!!! For this hubpage,just to know good people with family value.I pray GOD HEAL OUR PAIN AND HURT IN JESUS NAME.

onedaughter5sons 4 months ago

I have a situation that doesn't involve a trust but does involve the transfer of assets. My mother chose a lawyer and asked me (only daughter) to go with her to appt. I thought we were going to discuss a trust but the attorney suggested other ways to transfer her assets, cd's and her home, that were less costly than a trust. My mother chose to follow his advise. Basically she and I went to her bank and after she spoke to the bank president alone, she came out of his office and proceeded to take her name off her cd's and transfer them all to me, leaving her as the POD. A few months later and without my presence, the attorney and my Mother deeded the house to me and she retains a life estate. None of my brothers were listed on anything but it was understood that when she dies, I am to split the money and the house equally between myself and my brothers. For many reasons, she chose not to include their names. Divorce, bankruptcy, no job, drug abbuse. She also knows that I will not cheat anyone and will do what she wanted done with the money. This was in fall of 2009. In fall of 2010 one of my brothers (no job, drug abuse)abrubtly took her to another state to live with his girlfriend and himself. She didn't call any of us other kids to let us know this was happening but it appears she did it willingly. This sibling does not have a good relationship with the rest of us and has been MIA for decades at a time. She continues to stay there almost 1 1/2 years later. Now, she wants me to turn everything back into her name. The problem is that this brother cannot be trusted and my other brothers and I are afraid if she regains access to the assets, this brother will spend every last dime and send her back for one of us to take care of penniless or she will end up in a facility. Everything was done as to her wishes and with her attorney and it was understood that this money was to remain untouched until/unless she needed it or ended up in a nursing home. I have not done anything with the money, it remains in the same bank that she originally had it in. My concern is that she is starting to talk like this brother and doesn't sound at all like herself. I don't think she is unable to make decisions but she is definitely being coeerced by him. She has threatened to get a lawyer to try to get the money back in her name but I don't think she can do anything. Has anyone had any experience with this? She willingly did what she did and now she is only doing this because of his influence. I just want to know if she has a leg to stand on. Also, she has plenty of other cash to live on, she would be just fine if she wasn't living with this blood sucker that probably has her paying most of his bills and still wants more. After reading all of the previous posts I just wanted to give another perspective, sometimes the one in control is trying to do the right thing. I am thankful that I have the support of the rest of my brothers otherwise I would just give the money back and let her let him spend it. Any advice?

Deborah 4 months ago

Let me tell you what else is going on in this country, and the reason is because the government authorities will not investigate the financial institutions who align themselves with family members that are embezzling assets out of trust accounts.

My family, including my grown three daughters helped their father embezzle my whole trust account amounting to eighty million dollars, which instantly threw me into the streets penniless with my fine credit destroyed and I'm sixty-two years old. My ex-husband who set up this outrageous crime married the girlfriend he had, who is a financial advisor. She apparently helped him. This occured as of fourteen years ago.

The authorities won't help, so I finally saw no other way to help myself but write a four part memoir, which is in the process of being sold as I write this.

The saddest part of this story, is I had set up trusts for each of my children and this apparently wasn't enough money for them.

Lately my middle daughter has been begging for me to come back into her life, but continues to refuse to admit her betrayal. She just want's things the way they use to be, but the problem is I'm living in the streets now barely surviving, so until I can support myself I doubt if we'll have a healthy relationship. My other two daughters still refuse to talk to me. Why? Well I believe it's guilt.

Yes, money destroyed my family, but because the athorities won't do anything these crimes will never stop and the criminals will never have to face what they've done.

Deborah 4 months ago

Dear Mighty Mom,

You are correct about how trusts are written, however in my case it was very protective. Get this , my attorney? Justice Anthony "Tony" M. Kennedy. We grew up together; he's my sister's brother-in-law and he was my attorney before he became a Supreme Court Justice.

It doesn't matter today how a trust is written because the authorities ignore these crimes and the attorneys we hire to represent us are being paid under the table to protect the financial institutions and people like Tony Kennedy.

Can you imagine? I can't even get my file from Tony Kennedy and I've tried for a decade.

We are living today in a financial holocaust, sanctioned by the government.

I am not falling for my daughter's pleading cry for our relationship to be healed. No, she's made her bed and as much as it hurts me, I don't trust her.

Thank you for your response. It's like a breath of fresh air to be understood. But, I'm sorry for your troubles too. Why don't kids realize they had it all with your love?

I'm sure my book will be on Amazon because very large publishers are looking at it now. I will let you know the moment it sells.

God Bless you.

jan 3 months ago

This is HORRIBLE... this happened to me an my "handicapped" brother. My step uncle and his wife befriended my father who had three heart attacks, lung disease, heart disease and parkinson. His second wife had mental problem.

Long story.. neither people trusted these theives but they knew how to get things....everything. Now my brother is living in a group home.

Guest of this site 3 months ago

My sister-in-law wrote the book on cheating her unsuspecting brothers.

MrTrustStore 3 months ago

Hi Mighty Mom and Readers,

I haven't visited this hub for a while but when I do, I always find it interesting. It gives me a fresh perspective on what people are facing in the "real world". It also gives me a sense of the misinformation floating around. Regarding that, I did want to make a few comments. First, people shouldn't hesitate to look for an experienced attorney in their jurisdiction when they suspect foul play. If cost is an issue, you should know that there are always good attorneys out there who will give you a free consultation. That might be enough to either explain the situation a little better and allay fears or in the event that something nefarious is happening, get the help you need. Second, there truly is a difference in the quality of trusts out there. Just yesterday, I reviewed one trust that was fantastic and another that was terrible. Both from lawyers. It's amazing really and highlights the point that you need to make sure that your attorney has experience and hopefully comes highly recommended. Of course with do-it-yourself trusts you get what you pay for and as Mighty Mom pointed out with the explosion of baby boomers, we are no doubt going to see a lot more mistakes, illegal activity, and grief. Finally, in the case where assets were transferred down to one daughter only and she doesn't know what to do, I'd like to make a couple of points. One is that if an attorney took the time to go with your mother and do some planning and help transfer assets, he or she was no doubt being paid for legal advice/action. It makes no sense that he or she would not have set up a trust for the reason of cost because it would cost less than house calls, etc. Anyhow, one reason for getting assets out of an estate is for Medicaid (or in California, Medi-Cal planning). That is, there is a belief that mom or dad is going to wind up in skilled nursing care and they are going to end up broke if some planning is not done. Perhaps that is what the attorney was trying to help your mother do. Unfortunately this area of the law is one of the most complicated and often misunderstood. Plus, good intentions are often poorly executed, even by attorneys who do not regularly practice in this area. For instance, in your mother's case, a better course of action would have been to set up a precatory third-party special needs trust that held assets for the benefit of mom's care. If there was anything left after that, it could eventually go to the children. If there are problem children it could be held for their benefit without the ability to be used for things like drugs, gambling, etc. Also, if there is not a reliable trustee, a private professional trustee or bank (with Errors and Omissions Insurance) could be used. As for what's already been done, the question remains if a gift was actually made to you. There is a legal definition of a gift. What would help is if a 709 gift tax return was filed? Any gift (in 2012) above $13,000, requires a tax return. Simply giving it all to you and expecting you to later gift to your brothers however raises further issues. Not the least of which is that you theoretically could owe gift tax for those gifts, if made. Once you get into the facts and circumstances of any particular case, you start to see how complicated this area becomes. And the list of legal issues goes on and on really, but the point people should remember is that they ought to get competent help. It is out there!

Best,

MrTrustStore

MrTrustStore 3 months ago

Wow, you have certainly been through the ringer! I could understand your sentiment. (I was actually referring to onedaughter5sons above and not you however.) It sounds like great attorneys were involved with your case by the way. I don't know the exact facts so it is difficult for me to comment on your case. I do doubt that the attorneys were in it for the money though... I know that that is the perception sometimes but it is generally not the case... Also as bad as your case went, it would definitely be worse to recommend not writing a will or trust and not doing such for yourself. While you are not alone, most people who engage in estate planning do not have your experience. And doing nothing practically guarantees a "wrong" result for many people. Not only might their estate pass through probate, but there could easily be unintended beneficiaries, negative tax consequences, unwanted guardians of minor children, etc. I can almost hear you saying, "but that will happen anyway"-given your experience. But that simply is not true. What is true is that when human beings are involved, there will always be some problems for some people. There is corruption with charities, governments, financial institutions, etc. Does that make all charities, governments, etc. bad? Does one villain make all people bad? I know that in the wills and trust world, most of the time there is not a villain and things go relatively smoothly... But I do agree with one thing you said: Spending it all while you are alive is not a bad philosophy!

Deb 3 months ago

My heart goes out to anyone who has had this terrible incident happen to them and I get the idea that this has happened to far too many people, including myself. It is hard enough seeing your parents lose the their ability to function as they would want, but seems all too often the honest one gets all the caregiving duties, while the dishonest one (always scheming ) gets the money. From my experience with my mother's trust I would advise everyone to show this aritlce to your parents before they even begin a trust. My mother's instructions were too vague, do to the fact the attorney was my brother's friend (first mistake). And with so many attorneys, doctors and nursing homes wanting to make a quick buck, the real needs of the elderly is not their first interest. This should never happen to anyone. I had complete confidence that my brother ( his favorite book on facebook is the Bible) would do the right thing (wrong) PROTECT OUR PARENTS WISHES and your own by showing them this article.

azscumbag1 2 months ago

The details of the article is somewhat like the plan I used to steal my parents wills, claim that my mother died intestate when she died first, wrote up my own version of my father's will that my dad signed, that gave me first selection as my father's guardian and executor, and I also had my very ill and elderly father sign a Power of Attorney.

My sibling realized all of this and after investigation, had our state's Adult Protection Service investigate me and what had happened. The state's report frankly spelled out what I had done, correctly, and was forwarded to the probate court judge. I tried to have the report sealed, but apparently that didn't work. I even signed most all my father's investments and finances ownership over to both myself and my father jointly.

When my father died, the probate court ordered that I had to split some of the estate with my sibling, but I lied under oath and now have my parents home and most all my mother's possessions and my father's investments, stocks and annuity, in addition to my father's life insurance proceeds.

All this was done because I felt that my sibling deserved nothing, and I had two very ill elderly people to work on as well. I thought they never knew anything, but now it appears that they knew I was up to something long before they passed on.

Now, I am advised that my sibling has what amounts to overwhelming evidence against me, including recordings of others that assisted me advising my sibling that they saw my parents true wills and finances, when I told everyone else a totally different story. It appears that my parents knew what I might do, and before both died, they and my sibling protected themselves somehow, as my sibling knows exactly where, how and what I did, and even why.

It appears that my sibling has contacted no less than the FBI, the IRS CID, the U.S. Attorney, and is even authoring a book about what and how I did it, and how others can protect themselves...and I am scared to death what will happen. I could lose it all, my home, my career job, my already weak marriage, and of course all that I have from my parents.

Now, five years after my father passed on...I am worried, stone sick worried.

Me 2 months ago

This is so messed up, unless your parents treated you like shit.

Daniel 2 months ago

Thank you for writing this hub and for everyone else's contributions. It really has helped me see through some anger and betrayal issues I've had for a few years now.

Background:

I am the only son with 8 sisters and one other 1/2 brother. Me and my 8 sisters were very close because my father was not a nice man growing up and we had to stick together just to survive.

How it all began:

In the early 2000's my father was thrown in jail for 6 years for abusing his second wife (surprise!) and his other son.

At the time, I was the only one willing to help him out. (I do not blame my sisters for not helping him because he really was a jerk.)

Along with his main house and his rental houses, he also asked me to take care of his other finances, which I did. He had around $1.3 million in assets.

In the 3 years I took care of it, I never once took a dime or asked for any fees or anything else. NOTHING ever left his accounts because it wasn't mine to take and as the years passed it grew and grew.

I always made all my father's financial records available to my sisters at any time they wanted to see them. Not a problem. Everything was completely transparent and above board and they were going to stay that way. I am not a thief and my father's money wouldn't make me one.

Now during this time I was in charge, nearly every one of my sisters appoached me and asked for loans, handouts, etc. from his money for "you name it" tragedies where they just had to have his money for. I didn't give it to them because it wasn't mine to give, it was my Father's. Yeah, he was a jerk but I had given him my word that I would be honest with him and I was.

My sisters were not very happy about it and they all rationalized taking it because he had been a jerk and I was a bad guy now too for not giving it to them when I had the chance.

As time went on, two of my "loving" sisters (one a VERY devout Christian by the way, just ask her) began talking to my father again and got it into his head to check to make sure I was not stealing his money. They were jsut sure I was.

He did check up and he found out everything was in perfect order and just as it should have been. In his bank accounts and in his name.

Well the two holier than thou's still didn't believe it and they worked my other sisters telling them they just knew I was stealing somehow and I was doing nothing right and I could have been making more money for my father.

They made a huge stink over everything I did, right down to why I should pay property managers to take care of his rentals when I only lived 12 hours away and I could drive up and fix things when needed.

Since I really wasn't a big fan of my father anyway and since I got worn down and tired hearing crap from him and them every day, I finally told the two sisters why don't they just take care of things themselves for a while and I told my father if he wants to give them POA, do it.

HUGE MISTAKE!

The finances that were open to everyone, now were suddenly unavailable... And how dare you even question their integrity anyway? They went to church for goodness sakes!

We found out later, one of them, the devout Christain, bought herself a house and a car and a couple of other sisters got "loans" that were not ever paid back.

When my father got out, he had WAAAYYYY less money than he did before and he was not pleased.

My father and I actually began patching things up around that time and he then presented me with a will he had drawn up that left everything to me.

It was at this point I made HUGE MISTAKE #2...

I told him I don't want it all and that everything should be split up equally between us kids because otherwise it would just cause problems and I didn't want to lose my family over money. (My wife's family had just gone through this and I wanted nothing to do with it.)

I also felt that since all of us kids had gone through the same hell with him, we all deserved an equal share of the pie.

My father also always tried to make us jump for money or pitted us against each other for money to amuse himself and I never liked that and either did my sisters so I thought this would put an end to that.

My father said that is what he wanted to do so he was not going to change it and I could do with the money what I wanted later. I never heard anything after that point.

I did, however, inform my other sisters that he had made up this will and that I didn't want all the money. I told them they could tear up the will and we could claim it never existed and we would just split up his estate equally between us.

I was tired of the games he played all of our lives and it would be our way of not letting him get to us one last time.

Well everyone heartily agreed and several years went by.

My father's health went downhill and he eventually moved in with my dear Christian sister and she became POA for his finances again, now back up to around $1.3 million plus his main house and his rentals.

As it turned out, and unbeknownst to some of us, especially me, my dear sister was giving his money to her Pastor to the tune of hundreds of thousands of dollars and she was even charging my father a fee to prepared his meals and another for eating with her and her family. Talk about rationalizing stealing!

Also at this same time, she had my father write up a new will (surprise!), with the ever honest Pastor as a witness of course, that left her and my other greedy pig of a sister the lions share of what was left after they robbed him for 6 months.

$1.3 million and houses turned into $650k in 6 months for his "expenses" such as preparing meals and church donations, even when he never attended church.

(My sister has a plaque on a wing of the church which I don't believe is fair. I think my name should be on it too! No? LOL)

What made this all the better was during his last two weeks of his life and months after the new will was drawn up, these same sisters called me and asked if our agreement was still good and I said yes. Everything would be split equally.

(I heard later they had a good laugh while they were doing this. Seriously.)

Then, lo and behold, as soon as he died and the casket was closed, they trotted out the new will and wah la!

When I asked what the hell was going on after whe had just talked about this a couple of weeks before...

One called me "Greedy pants" and yelled at me and told me, "GET OVER IT!"

The other told me "Maybe you should have played it differently."

Apparently I should have and I was the absolute fool for trusting them.

Never in a million years, after what we all went through growing up together, would I ever have expected to be stabbed in the back so blatantly and so callously.

I had went out of my way to make things right for everyone and, to be honest, to make everyone feel they didn't have to be manipulated by my father anymore to get what was rightfully their fair share and these two went out of their way to rip us off.

The betrayal is the worst, they can have the money if it means that much to them, but to know you've been sold for a few dimes is what I can't just can't seem to get over.

How do you sell out your own and laugh in their faces when you do?

And the kicker to the whole story is they are both well off so they didn't even need the money!

NOW FOR THE KARMA PART:

One sister has serious health issues and is miserable. Alot of it is due to stress.

AND THE OTHER... THE DEVOUT CHRISTIAN...

She just found out she's been ripped off by her new husband for almost a year now and she is now completely broke... AND THE NEW HUSBAND IS A PASTOR!

LMAO!

DANIEL 2 months ago

One last thing...

Can you guess my response when I heard my devout sister is now the one ripped off?

Yep, you got it...

"Karma's a bitch ain't it! GET OVER IT!"

DANIEL 2 months ago

P.S. Thanks for letting me vent. It helps.

collegekid2011 2 months ago

This is happening to me right now! I just got my court date for the order to show cause. I can't wait to see what my aunts come up with after the judge orders them to provide financial documents from 2006 on, POA filings, real estate transactions etc.

akma 2 months ago

I read your posting and all the remaining postings. We are going through the same thing.It is scary how cold people can be.

Karma 3 weeks ago

Does the IRS enter into the picture in any way; income not claimed, etc. ????